Bloke with shiny pinstripe suit in patronising deal to steal money from youngsters
Rating: I really like that Snoopy Snoopy Dog Dog
by Tony Alton
Bruce, Brad, Daniel, Evan, Delores and Jemima at UpSNAP (only 1 lower case letter) had just decided item point 4 on the agenda. It had taken them 6 hours but it was finally agreed that the new corporate logo should be in Cornflour blue as opposed to California Yellow. Delores had put up a good fight, and had a good point that it was more on-message to go with the California Yellow, but had lacked punch in making her point when she spilt biscuit crumbs down her Ralph Lauren blouse. And quite frankly Daniel and Evan have always teamed up against her. Now point 5 on the agenda hung heavy over the board room table, how to make as much money as possible from those funny street urchins who wear back to front baseball caps and baggy clothes. Bruce had paid 30 quid to one of them for an Oxo cube wrapped in tin foil the other day and quite frankly he wasn’t happy.
And so UpSNAP’s PreUmium Urban Content package was born. With more ridiculous capitals than a fast shifting African nation the service promises to whip the pocket money away with a streaming RNB and Hip Hop mobile service for Gangsta’s and Husslers with a spare 5 bucks a month and a flash handset. Again, another niche mobile music product, will it make any serious dollar? (street speak for MONEY) who knows, probably more profitable to sell Skrank to schoolkids.
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