UK iPhone launch rumours
Rating: Jobs leaves Cupertino wearing Union Jack pants (and black roll neck)
by Tony Alton
Rumour has it that dark outriders have been seen packing boiled sweets into their black winged steeds at the Cupertino ranch in preparation for the UK launch of the iPhone. According to some scared local teenagers little Brian climbed over the ranch gates after becoming mesmerised by a glowing package one of the outriders was packing, and has not been seen since. In another strange twist UK sales of camp beds have rocketed and a crowd of distant-looking Jobsciples have started milling around at the gates of the UK Apple store. Nokia have dispatched a couple of 4ft tall boys with big hairy feet, a dwarf with an axe and a long bearded old man in a white apron who keeps shouting “YOU WILL NOT PASS!” at people.
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